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Tonight, Tonight: Like Vin Diesel in XXX, We Light Up the Bad Guys Who Are Hot & Sweaty But Not Naked

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The inspiration for the title (and not nasty, I promise).

Yeah, the porn sites are going to like me for that one. But I don't care, cuz the Winnipeg Jets and their fans are going to fire up the MTS Centre like a car in Montreal. Our first victim? Well hell, it's the Canadiens, that aging franchise that pays Scott Gomez like he pisses Cristal.

Hey it's all in good fun, they can always rag on us by saying we're just the Atlanta Thrashers in Jets drag (Pun-day Sunday!), but at least at the end of the day both teams' fans will support their team, win or lose.

Time/Location: 4pm CT / MTS Centre

Our Boys (line projections):

Forwards

#16 Andrew Ladd - #18 Bryan Little - #26 Blake Wheeler

#9 Evander Kane - #8 Alexander Burmistrov - #80 Nik Antropov

#15 Tanner Glass - #55 Mark Scheifele - #13 Kyle Wellwood

#14 Tim Stapleton - #19 Jim Slater - #22 Chris Thorburn

Defencemen

#39 Tobias Enstrom - #52 Dustin Byfuglien

#5 Mark Stuart - #4 Zach Bogosian

#5 Ron Hainsey - #29 Johnny Oduya

Goaltender

#31 Ondrej Pavelec

Note: Brett MacLean wasn't listed on the official opening day rosters, so I'm loathe to figure out where Tim Stapleton figures into the lines.

The Fun-Size NHL Team

Forwards

#13 Mike Cammalleri - #14 Tomas Plekanec - #46 Andrei Kostitsyn

#67 Max Pacioretty - #11 Scott Gomez - #21 Brian Gionta

#52 Mathieu Darche - #51 David Desharnais - #72 Erik Cole

#32 Travis Moen - #63 Andreas Engqvist - #68 Yannick Weber

Defencemen

#75 Hal Gill - #76 P.K. Subban

#6 Jaroslav Spacek - #26 Josh Gorges

#74 Alexei Emelin - #61 Raphael Diaz

Goaltender

#31 Carey Price

What You Should Do If You're Going to the Game: Get something that comes with a cheese bucket, and wordlessly give it to an usher. Best picture of your random act of kindness wins something.

Prediction: Hal Gill and Dustin Byfuglien eat the Habs forwards like Lit'l Smokies and get match penalties. After play resumes, the Canadiens, minus Desharnais (gnawed leg), Gionta (swallowed whole), and Cammalleri (fork wounds), are too tired to keep up with the Jets. 3 to 1 Jets, with Mark Scheifele getting his first NHL goal and doing his damnedest to keep us from sending him down.

Be sure to join us tonight in the game thread!