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Tanky Tankerson Von Tankenstein: Jets LOSE 6-2.

Yeah. So. This got weird. Blake Wheeler fought the least likely Bruin to get into a fight. Byfuglien cursed out an actual child. Hellebuyck makes me have sads. Ehlers is beautiful. I love Tyler Myers. Also, I photoshopped a Thorburn.

By bbmellen
Bruce Fedyck-USA TODAY Sports

The Jets were trounced tonight by the Boston Bruins with a final score of 6 to 2. As a Jets fan who is also a Bruins fan, I have many odd feelings about this but overall I'm happy beyond all reason. Why?

TANK. TANK. TANK.

via GIPHY

Ten Things

1) Things we saw tonight:

Christ Thorburn vs. Zac Rinaldo

Tyler Myers (*swoon*) vs. Matt Beleskey

Blake Wheeler vs. Patrice Bergeron. (No, really)(That is a real thing that happened)(I'm not even lying)

Also, Dustin Byfuglien got mean with Precious Angel Child (David Pastrnak, for the uninitiated) after he jabbed at a puck hidden in Hutchinson's pads. What a weird little angry game for both of these teams.

2) Enstrom? Puck to the face? Ouch bud. I'm glad that he was able to come back sporting a nice line of stitches but his poor noggin...

3) I'm still on the tank train by the way. Nobody is gonna pry my ass off this seat. I'm riding this all the way to Auston Matthews Station. VIVA LA TANK.

4) Nikolaj Ehlers is super fantastic you guys. Not gonna lie. I really enjoy watching him play the hockey and I don't think I'm alone there. He's getting aggressive but staying pretty smart for the most part. I love it.

5) Now it's time for a very special message for Chris Thorburn:

Hey buddy. It's been a while since we chatted and in that time, you appear to have grown an entire horde of muskrats on your face. Do you need some help getting rid of that infestation? Please let me know as soon as possible. I fear you are getting involved in some kind of host/parasite situation with those rodents on your head....

muskrat beard

6) I feel for Hellebuyck. I don't know what I feel, but I feel for the poor kid. He's trying so hard you guys.

7) Auston Matthews shares a birthday with Alexander Ovechkin. This is an important fact to know just in case.

8) See above re: Nikolaj Ehlers

9) Bryan Little scored the Jets first goal of the game. I like Little. I like him a lot actually.

10) Casual reminder that the Jets lost to a team that got flattened 9-2 by the Los Angeles Kings last game and still willingly employ and play Zac Rinaldo and Kevan Miller every single game.

PS: If you're not following Pete Blackburn on twitter you're doing it wrong.

Good job Jerts. I'm so proud of you all.