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Hockey Wives Episode 2: Bambi on Ice

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Ashley Booth learns to skate and Kodette continues her search for nachos.

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Tiffany Parros: Tiffany is just as brutally honest and hilarious as ever this episode. This episodes takes Tiffany and a few of the other wives to Las Vegas for the NHL Awards. One of the most intriguing scenes involves a pool side discussion about cheaters in the NHL. All of the women agree that the husbands that cheat on their wives are pretty much scumbags and openly acknowledge that it does happen. The discussion is frank and honest and Tiffany states that she'd be more likely to find her husband passed out in a bush somewhere than in another woman's bed. Later, we get to go racing with the Parros' and Getzlafs and it's hilarious. Tiffany discusses that there's a man giving her directions in the car with her as she drives and she says that all she wants to do is tell him to shut up. Later on, we learn that she beat Paige Getzlaf's time at the racetrack and we are treated to the best Tiffany line of this show: "I feel like Danica Patrick.. I mean did she ever win shit? No, but she was hot, she was smart."

Ashley Booth: This episode introduces us to Ashley and guys... I can't help but love her. She and husband David Booth are very strong in their Christian faith and while it gets grating at times, I adore her bubbly nature. My favorite thing ever is the scene where she learns to skate and almost takes David's sister's head off with a slapshot before falling over. After she gets to her feet again, she proceeds to inform David that nothing about hockey is natural and everything is weird. I adore her. She also compares her hockey/skating skills to Bambi on Ice and I just.... she's awesome. Later, we again get to see Ashley learn more things about hockey and she admits that she knows nothing about the game and has been struggling to learn which I appreciate. She scores her very own hat trick on an open net in the driveway of their home and it's adorable. Minus the overdone stuff about God which I will not get into here because this is neither the time nor the place, Ashley Booth is delightful.

Paige Getzlaf: Okay, so I thought it was hilarious when I (Bree) ended up getting  to write about Paige because everyone who knows me knows that I think Ryan Getzlaf and his baldy head are pretty awful. That being said, Paige is hilarious. I thought she was going to be annoying at first because within two minutes she was talking about how challenging it can be to be the wife of the team captain and I instantly was reminded of a certain LA Brown wife from last season. Luckily, the scenes with Paige and Ryan together are pretty awesome and easily remove all thoughts of that ugliness. The scenes at the race track are pretty hilarious and actually kind of endear me to Ryan. Which feels weird. And wrong. I think what I enjoy about Paige and Ryan is that they are goofy together. It's adorable. While at dinner with the Parros' (Parroses? Parrosi? Parroses?) Paige discusses that she wants to start her own jewelry company and somehow the conversation turns to joining the mile high club. I don't know. It's delightful.

Maripier Morin: So in love... she's so in love.... and they gave her a gun. We get to see a quick shot of MP and Brandon continuing their engagement moon (that's what I'm calling it, shut up) as they take in some kind of carnival and play some games. That's it. That's all. Bye bye MP and Brandon! See you next episode maybe!

Or not.

Because the last scene of the episode discusses the trade of Brandon Prust to the Vancouver Canucks. It is sadness and tears because this scene is juxtaposed with scenes of MP and Brandon enjoying their vacation and being madly in love. MP talks about how there's no stress and they are both so relaxed and calm.... then the show cuts to a scene of Kodette LaBarbera and Jason catching the live news of Prust being traded. We don't get to see much of MP's reaction until next episode but it looks like sadness, tears and crying little otters of woe.

Angela Price: Angela's story line this season is clearly them trying to have a kid and while I love her, I hate that it seems like that is all she talks about. Super weird. Okay, we must talk about the whole cheating talk thing that they have in Las Vegas because it is super self-aware? They all know cheating happens and talk about what they do when they see it. It changes if they like the wife/girlfriend being cheated on, but most of the time they just think the guy is a jerk and ignore it unless asked.

Rhianna Weaver: not on this episode. Cara has sads.

Kodette Labarera: Kodette gets a break from her family and goes to Las Vegas to visit her friends. Kodette remains after my heart and wants nachos for lunch. Luv her. She does not get them, but I still love her. For her birthday she wants to play bubble soccer and does it. Aaaand now I want to play bubble soccer. Now for the best line of the night: "This is a new definition of sweaty balls." Yep. Kodette is real as dirt and that is a compliment.

Martine Forget: First of all, Tyler Bernier is adorable and I just want to squish his cheeks. Martine decided to take time off from modelling after Tyler was born, but now that he is older she is ready to work again. Hey, maternity leave is one year in parts of Canada so I can get behind this movement. Forget does a lingerie photoshoot and then posts it on Instagram. She is aware that she is skinny and therefore does not want to point out she is not photoshopped. Weird, I guess. Martine is weird to me and I think a lot of that is because she is in a profession I do not understand. She works hard though and seems smart. She's cool, just not the type of person I would hang out with. BUT THEN SHE SKYPES WITH JONATHAN AND TYLER and she makes a lot more sense? She is trying to get back to being a career woman, but also wants to be with her son. I like her, just not to hang out with.

Puppy Update: No puppies this episode. Show needs more puppy.