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The Games That Never Happened: Winnipeg Jets at Washington Capitals - October 19, 2012 6:00PM Verizon Center

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Thanks to the NHL lockout, Arctic Ice Hockey provides a faux boxscore as the Jets' take on the Washington Capitals.

Geoff Burke-US PRESSWIRE

Continuing with our series of The Games That Never Happened, today the Winnipeg Jets were to hit the road on their first trip of the season, starting with a tilt against the Washington Capitals. That won't be happening -- at least not according to schedule -- so instead you'll have to read our faux box score to see how the game played out.

Careful, it's faux!

With that, we now present The Games That Never Happened - Winnipeg at Washington.

Enjoy!

WINNIPEG JETS at WASHINGTON CAPITALS
Oct. 19, 2012 at Verizon Center, Washington, D.C.
Start: 6:05 pm - End: 8:51 pm
Attendance: 18,277
FINAL
# PER STR TIME EVENT DESCRIPTION

SCORE

1

1

EV

20:00

PSTR

FIRST PERIOD BEGINS.


WPG 0, WSH0

2

1

EV

19:59

FACE

WPG won Neu. Zone Face-Off - WPG #19 SLATER vs WSH #63 M. RIBEIRO


WPG 0, WSH 0

3

1

EV

17:37

SHOT

WSH #8 OVECHKIN, SNAP SHOT STOPPED BY WPG #31 PAVELEC


WPG 0, WSH 0

4

1

EV

15:05

ICING

WPG #33 BYFUGLIEN, ICING.


WPG 0, WSH 0

5

1

EV

15:04

FACE

WSH won Off. Zone Face-Off - WSH #19 BACKSTROM vs WPG #80 ANTROPOV. ANNOUNCER JOE BENINATI REMINDS VIEWERS THERE IS NO RELATION BETWEEN BACKSTROM AND THE FINNISH GOALTENDER OF THE MINNESOTA WILD.


WPG 0, WSH 0

6

1

EV

12:43

SHOT

WPG #16 LADD, WRIST SHOT STOPPED BY WSH #70 HOLTBY. ALL CAMERAS PAN THE ARENA LOOKING FOR BRADEN HOLTBY'S MOM BEFORE REALIZING SHE ONLY SHOWS UP TO PLAYOFF GAMES.


WPG 0, WSH 0

7

1

EV

07:28

PEN

WPG #24 CLITSOME, 2 MIN INTERFERENCE, Neutral Zone


WPG 0, WSH 0

8

1

PP

5:28

SCHEME

WASHINGTON'S POWER PLAY CONSISTS SOLEY OF ALEXANDER OVECHKIN ONE-TIMERS WHICH ARE BLOCKED ONE AFTER ANOTHER BY MARK STUART. ADAM OATES SHAKES HIS HEAD AT THE LACK OF OFFENSIVE CREATIVITY.


WPG 0, WSH 0

9

1

EV

0:00

END

END OF FIRST PERIOD


WPG 0, WSH 0

10

2

EV

18:18

HIT

WSH #26 HENDRICKS, Off. Zone. HENDRICKS HITS WPG #33 BYFUGLIEN SO HARD THAT HE REVEALS BYFUGLIEN TO HAVE BEEN STUFFING HIS PANTS WITH SUB SANDWICHES.


WPG 0, WSH 0

11

2

EV


15;13

T.O.

WSH #52 GREEN TURNS PUCK OVER AT OFFENSIVE BLUE LINE, SENDING WPG #18 LITTLE IN ON A BREAKAWAY. STOPPED BY WSH #70 HOLTBY. FANS BEGIN "WHOOPING" GREEN. SOMETIMES HE WISHES HE WERE LARRY MURPHY/SERGEI GONCHAR SO THE CAPS WOULD TRADE HIM TO A FUTURE STANLEY CUP WINNER.


WPG 0, WSH 0

12

2

EV

14:46

BLOCK

WSH #8 OVECHKIN, SNAP SHOT BLOCKED BY WPG #5 STUART. IT SEEMS THE ENTIRE NHL HAS KEYED IN ON THE FACT THAT OVECHKIN ONLY HAS ONE MOVE.


WPG 0, WSH 0

13

2

EV

13:54

HIT

WSH #55 SCHULTZ, Def. Zone. FANS ARE SHOCKED THAT JEFF SCHULTZ ACTUALLY USED HIS 6'6" FRAME TO HIT AN OPPOSING PLAYER. BENINATI FEELS THIS IS AS GOOD A TIME AS ANY TO REMIND US THAT SCHULTZ IS NOT RELATED TO EITHER JUSTIN OR NICK OF THE EDMONTON OILERS.


WPG 0, WSH 0

14

2

EV

11:27

GOAL

WPG #4 POSTMA, SLAP SHOT 16 FT, FROM #19 SLATER (1), #13 WELLWOOD (2). JETS FANS REJOICE OVER THE SECOND COMING OF MARK FLOOD. THEY WILL QUESTION WHY POSTMA ISN'T IN THE LINE-UP THREE MONTHS FROM NOW EVEN THOUGH THIS WILL BE THE ONLY POINT HE SCORES.


WPG 1, WSH 0

15

2

EV

11:27

DRINK

COLOUR ANALYST CRAIG LAUGHLIN GETS TO THAT POINT IN A BROADCAST WHERE HE TRIES TO DO HIS JOB DRUNK AGAIN. LLOYD THE BARTENDER SMIRKS FROM HIS PRESS BOX SEAT.


WPG 1, WSH 0

16

2

EV

7:57

PEN

WSH #25 CHIMERA, 2 MIN CHARGING, Off. Zone.


WPG 1, WSH 0

17

2

PP

5:58

SUB

AFTER FAILING TO SCORE ON THE POWER PLAY, WPG #33 BYFUGLIEN TRIES TO CHANGE HIS FORTUNES WITH A COLD-CUT COMBO.


WPG 1, WSH 0

18

2

EV

3:14

FACE

WSH won Neu. Zone Face-Off, WSH #21 LAICH vs WPG #12 JOKINEN. AFTER WINNING THE FACE-OFF, LAICH SENSES TROUBLE. HE SKATES OFF THE ICE TO GO FIX A FANS FLAT TIRE IN THE PARKING LOT, RESCUE A CAT FROM A NEARBY TREE AND SAVE A WOMAN'S WASHER DRYER SET FROM A RAGING HOUSE FIRE.

WPG 1, WSH 0

19

2

EV

2:02

PING

WSH #8 OVECHKIN LAUNCHES A ROCKET OFF THE CROSSBAR BEHIND WPG #31 PAVELEC. BENINATI CALLS IT A BUZZ-BOMB. LAUGHLIN DRINKS.


WPG 1, WSH 0

20

2

EV

1:02

OFFSIDE

WPG #80 ANTROPOV. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS CAREER, ANTROPOV WAS ACTUALLY AHEAD OF THE PLAY.


WPG 1, WSH 0



21

2

EV

0:24

PEN

WPG #8 BURMISTROV, 2 MIN SPEARING, Neu. Zone


WPG 1, WSH 0

22

2

PP/PK

0:00

END

END OF SECOND PERIOD


WPG 1, WSH 0

23

3

PP

19:02

SCHEME

WSH HAS NOT LEARNED FROM ANY OF THE COACHING THEY RECEIVED AFTER THEIR LAST POWER PLAY. FRUSTRATED, ADAM OATES GRABS WSH #55 SCHULTZ'S STICK AND HOPS OVER THE BOARDS, EAGER TO SHOW HIS PLAYERS HOW TO SET UP AN EFFECTIVE POWER PLAY. HE ASSISTS ON A GOAL BY WSH #19 BACKSTROM BEFORE BEING PENALIZED FOR TOO MANY MEN ON THE ICE.


WPG 1, WSH 0

24

3

EV

17:45

HUNT

BENINATI REMARKS HOW SIMILAR THIS TEAM IS TO DALE HUNTER'S SQUAD OF LAST YEAR. LAUGHLIN NOTES THEY STILL STRUGGLE TO SCORE.


WPG 1, WSH 0

25

3

EV

9:24

SAJAK

PAT SAJAK IS SIGHTED ON THE JUMBOTRON. AS USUAL, SAJAK IS PISSED HE'S ON THE JUMBOTRON.


WPG 1, WSH 0

26

3

EV

7:33

B-POWER

WSH #20 BROUWER TRIES TO ENERGIZE THE TEAM WITH BROUWER POWER BUT PROVES UNSUCCESSFUL. NO ONE HAS A CLUE WHERE WHERE WSH #21 LAICH IS.


WPG 1, WSH 0

27

3

EV

6:00

CHANT

CROWD BOOS THE CAPS. THIS IS THE WORST GAME EVER, UNTIL THE NEXT TIME THEY LOSE IN A PIVOTAL GAME 7.


WPG 1, WSH 0

28

3

EV

4:43

OMG

WSH #52 GREEN ATTEMPTS A PASS TO WSH #90 JOHANSSON, BUT FANS ON THE PUCK. WPG #8 BURMISTROV STEALS THE PUCK AND STARTS OFF ON A BREAKAWAY. GREEN FALLS DOWN. WSH #55 SCHULTZ HAS NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON. BURMISTROV (1) SCORES GLOVE-SIDE ON WSH #70 HOLTBY. WSH #74 CARLSON AND WSH #27 ALZNER LOOK AT EACH OTHER AND ROLL THEIR EYES AT THE CONCEPT OF "TEAM DEFENSE". LLOYD THE BARTENDER IS STILL SMIRKING. BRYAN MUIR BLUSHES.


WPG 2, WSH 0

29

3

EV

2:02

SHOT

WSH #25 CHIMERA, WRIST SHOT STOPPED BY #31 PAVELEC. PUCK FROZEN. PAVELEC IS IN LINE FOR HIS FIRST SHUTOUT OF THE YEAR.

WPG 2, WSH 0

30

3

EV

0:22

JYNX

WSH #19 BACKSTROM (2), WRIST SHOT 2FT, FROM #8 OVECHKIN (2), #52 GREEN (1).


WPG 2, WSH 1

31

3

EV

0:00

END

GAME OVER


WPG 2, WSH 1

THREE STARS:

1. ALEXANDER BURMISTROV (WPG) - 1G, GWG

2. ONDREJ PAVELEC (WPG) - 35 SVS, 1GA, W

3. BRADEN HOLTBY (WSH) - 28 SVS, 2GA