I'm Saving Hockey: A BTN June 12th Recap

Ooh, that's one juicy, heart-filled hockey play.

P.S. The charts will look better if you enter the story on a new page.

A couple of months ago, our League of Extraordinary Statisticians discussed what stat they consult when thinking about a player's value.  The general consensus was that there isn't a singular stat that captures everything; as usual, they were wrong.  While they agonized over the Corsis and the Fenwicks and all those other things they dream up in their basement, they totally missed the mark.  Let's just make this easy for you guys: this year's worst and best players (minimum 30 games played, though I should make it 82 you pansies)...

Rank Player Team Pos GP PIM Minor Pen Major Pen PIM/G Maj/G
605th Loui Eriksson  DAL  L 79 8 4 0 0.101 0.000
606th Mats Zuccarello  NYR  L 42 4 2 0 0.095 0.000
607th Brian Campbell  CHI  D 65 6 3 0 0.092 0.000
608th Nick Leddy  CHI  D 46 4 2 0 0.087 0.000
609th Dan Sexton  ANA  R 47 4 2 0 0.085 0.000
610th Trevor Lewis  LAK  C 72 6 3 0 0.083 0.000
611th-T Cal O'Reilly  NSH  C 38 2 1 0 0.053 0.000
611th-T Vladimir Zharkov  NJD  R 38 2 1 0 0.053 0.000
613th Jared Spurgeon  MIN  D 53 2 1 0 0.038 0.000

Seriously, hit something.  I guess it could be worse...

Rank Player Tm Pos GP PIM Minor Pen Major Pen PIM/G Maj/G
Dead Last Kyle Wellwood  SJS  C 35 0 0 0 0.000 0.000

 Even the octopus got a penalty this year.

Now, for the winner of the, you guessed it, Heart Trophy...

Rank Player Tm Pos GP PIM Minor Pen Major Pen PIM/G Maj/G
1st George Parros  ANA  R 78 171 8 27 2.192 0.346
2nd Jared Boll  CBJ  R 73 182 15 24 2.493 0.329
3rd Cam Janssen  STL  R 54 131 13 17 2.426 0.315
4th Zenon Konopka  NYI  C 82 307 31 25 3.744 0.305
5th Colton Orr  TOR  R 46 128 14 14 2.783 0.304
6th Trevor Gillies  NYI  L 39 165 15 11 4.231 0.282
7th Krys Barch  DAL  R 44 80 5 12 1.818 0.273
8th Paul Bissonnette  PHX  L 48 71 3 13 1.479 0.271
9th Kevin Westgarth  LAK  C 56 105 10 15 1.875 0.268
10th-T Zack Stortini  EDM  R 32 76 8 8 2.375 0.250
10th-T Kyle Clifford  LAK  L 76 141 13 19 1.855 0.250

Congrats to George Parros and everyone else on this list.  Your teams would've won been lost without you.

This week's articles:

Tuesday: The Hottest Ticket in Winnipeg

Grandpa's Analysis: So young, so full of life...it's like the Jets were never ruthlessly plucked away by the sweaty fingers of a warm-weather franchise and its snide little muse.

Wednesday: Statistical OOPS

GA: You didn't resolve the larger problem: counting these things in the first place.

Thursday: BZS 2.0: Ironing Things Out a Bit

GA: Yeah, that totally cleared things up for me.  I was so worried.

Thursday: Kevin Cheveldayoff is not Tim Cheveldae

GA: You mean Tim Cheveldae the firefighter?

Friday: Who We Be, Winnipeg HC? --- Centres

GA: Too long, didn't read.  Man, those jerseys were ugly.

The sad part is that Parros won't get the recognition he deserves.  Unless I save hockey.

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